Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize