i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
