so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize