i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
