i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Success! We fucked roommates!
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
