Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize
