I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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