Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Alive.
So much puke
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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