Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Randomize
