Do you still have your period?
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
