The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
