Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(732): View more from New Jersey

fuck the hobbit

(301): View more from Maryland

what about unicorns?

(732): View more from New Jersey

fuck those pointy horses

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(574): View more from Indiana

I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink

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(304): View more from West Virginia

nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores

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(770): View more from Georgia

and technically it was a rebound

(407): View more from Florida

so lol

(770): View more from Georgia

and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game

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(605): View more from South Dakota

I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before

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(828): View more from North Carolina

I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much

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(706): View more from Georgia

Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I look excited, but its just a facade.

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