It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize