Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
