You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
