I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Randomize
