He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
