And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
