Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
