Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Randomize
