New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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