I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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