At least make sure they are 18
Why
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize