everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize