You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
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