why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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