I'm really into asian looking animals
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
