he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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