the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Randomize
