There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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