I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
