i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
