I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
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