i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
