He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
