I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
