If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
