so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
