We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
