I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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