I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
