Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
