we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
