Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
