one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
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