when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
