i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Sober January is a disaster.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
