If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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