@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
