Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
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