I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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